your prayers are always heard

Imagine this:

The King sits upon his throne in a sprawling chamber surrounded on all sides by infinite troops of mighty angels, the Holy Tzaddikim come and go petitioning the King and receiving His direct acknowledgement.

Outside the door to the King's chamber there is an anteroom, there the beinonim crush in a throng around the door passing notes in to be read to the King. They aren't allowed to enter, but they are at least priviledged with passing their prayers into the room.

At the far end of the anteroom the resha'im, the evildoers scornfully loiter, without any access to the King's ear.

That's the way the Tikkunei Zohar describes the scene. It seems to be in direct contradiction to the advice of the Ba'al Shem Tov: You should pray with the certain knowledge that your prayer will be answered.

How can we reconcile the two views? Either the Ba'al Shem Tov was only speaking to the Tzaddikim or else he knows something we don't know.

In fact, more than that, we know how much HaShem loves His children. (ie. infinitely more than the most a parent has ever (unconditionally) loved their child) So how could HaShem let a prayer go unheard? Moreso, a prayer that is unheard is a secret known only to the one who prayed it, and yet we say that the hidden things are for HaShem and only the revealed parts of creation are for us. (הנסתרות לה' אלקנו) These hidden prayers are under HaShem's sole jurisdiction, how could these prayers be refused entry into the King's chamber?

Perhaps Rebbe Nachman can enlighten us: In the past we discussed his teaching that prayers born of utter despair are always welcomed into the chamber of the King. [see prayers cleaving to prayers] The real trick here is that all the half-hearted or unintentioned prayers that loiter around, unable to enter the King's chamber, are embraced and wrapped up within a true prayer born from desperation. HaShem Himself brings such a prayer into His chamber and there, alone with this very precious prayer, all the other prayers are unwrapped and revealed.

Here we see that HaShem created the world with a structure and a system, it's called midah k'neged midah. (or 'a turn for a turn' as translated by R' Lazer Brody) The system (figuratively) handles the day to day function of how the world should work. But HaShem also created prayer as a means to petition HaShem directly, perhaps we could say (again figuratively) a means to balance the system. This is a secret backchannel established with His beloved children and it's actually bidirectional.

You see, we've learned previously one of the most basic (and crucial) lessons of the Baal Shem Tov: When HaShem wants to give us more blessing than we deserve, (according to the system of midah k'neged midah) He wraps that blessing up in a package of suffering. When we experience the suffering and thank God for that suffering recognizing that anything that comes from God is ultimately for our own good, we merit to remove that outer package of suffering and get at all the surplus of blessing hidden within.

That's one direction of the backchannel. The other direction is prayer. As we just learned prayer lets us wrap up our prayers, all our needs and desires, all of our confusion, everything in the desperate prayers of any member of the Jewish people. One person's genuine prayer is enough to raise up the needs and wants of all to God's attentive ear.

Prayer is the general 'upload' channel, but repentance, Teshuvah, is a more specific protocol of prayer. Through Teshuvah we can awaken HaShem's infinite Mercy and bring down limitless influx of blessing. The reason it can bring down so much blessing is because it contains an element of the download channel as well -- we thank HaShem for the sin, for the fact that we failed the test, recognizing that even our failure comes from God, and even our failure was ultimately in our best interest.

In short, there's this whole massive edifice that is the rules and structure of creation, and then there's the entirely personal, entirely private relationship HaShem has with His children. The structure is really there to educate us, and to sustain us as long as we don't know how to access that personal relationship. But don't be mistaken, the entire goal of your existence is discovering and developing that personal relationship.

So if you find yourself standing outside in the anteroom this Rosh HaShanah, don't forget that you have a V.I.P. pass to the afterparty.

brand spanking new

When a baby comes into the world, there are two things (and only two things) it needs to work on. Only after it has mastered these two can it really move on to the rest of life. What are the two things? (1) eating its food, and (2) excreting its waste. 

If you watch a newborn, you will see just how much effort they expend performing these two apparently simple tasks.

What I only realized recently is that in a broad sense we can be (and generally are, for most of our lives) spiritual newborns. Spiritually speaking our souls alternate between performing holy deeds like mitzwoth, hesed, prayer or learning, and removing the waste and damage done through less than spiritual endeavors, through teshuvah. 

It's not really such a long jump to relate mitzwot (and everything else we categorized along with them) as 'eating' because we know that in Gan Eden, the souls are clothed in the mitzwoth they performed in their lifetime; just as the food we eat becomes the flesh our souls wear in this world. Along the same lines, the connection between the expulsion of waste from the body and the expulsion of waste from the soul (teshuvah) is apparent.

The really interesting question for all of us to think about is: Newborns grow up, and move beyond eating and excreting to many far more interesting goals; what comes next spiritually?

Yes, just as these two basic functions (eating and excreting) still play a real role in our day to day adult existence, our spiritual lives will forever revolve around mitzwoth and teshuvah, but the spaces in between is where all the real depth takes place, where relationships are built, and life is given meaning.

I believe that HaShem put all the deepest secrets of life (the universe and everything) right in front of us. If we really stop and think about life and living, growth and growing, we'll see just how far our souls can grow.

razing jericho

יהושע בן נון חיבר תפילת עלינו לשבח בנצחון יריחו ובו מסיימים כל תפילה כדי להזכירנו שבכל תפילה אפשר לזכות לכנס בארץ הקודש

The prayer with which we end each one of the three daily tefillot, (prayers) Aleinu L'shabayah, was originally penned by Yehoshuah Ben Nun.

He composed Aleinu upon the conquest of Yericho (Jericho) when Bnei Yisrael first entered the land that was to become the land of Yisrael, already promised to Avraham Yitzhak and Yaakov.

From this we can take away that every single prayer has the potential to be like the first time we entered the land of Israel.

Bnei Yisrael surrounded the city seven times, blowing the shofar, and the walls came tumbling down. HaShem fought on our behalf, and we followed His instructions in good faith.

Every prayer has the same potential, we work to refine each of our own attributes, the seven middoth, through the blowing of the shofar, reminding ourselves to return to HaShem in true Teshuvah, and then HaShem brings us out of Egypt and returns us to our land, to closeness with Him.

With every prayer from start to finish we can enter the land and conquer it. Dwell in it in the comfort of HaShem's merciful protections. Perhaps this is why we say the blessing Goel Yisrael - He redeems Israel, in each of the amidahs.

if you can't join em, beat em [2/2]

Coming back to the metaphor of eating and what we can learn from it, I think it would be wise to review Rebbe Nachman's lesson we learned a while back titled "let's eat in." (see: http://awaxingwellspring.blogspot.com/2008/02/lets-eat-in.html)

We see that in addition to the act of consuming food, it is easy for us to be consumed by something else, a feeling, an idea, an experience. When we say 'consumed by' we mean it literally. We are absorbed into that experience and become a part of its nature.

Here to what we learned in part 1 applies. When we are part of an experience we are either being absorbed, consumed, and changed by it, or we are consuming and changing it. It's eat or be eaten.

Sometimes when the experience is positive and good for us, we want to be 'eaten.' It refines and purifies us, as Rebbe Nachman teaches. These kind of experiences, visiting the Holy Land, visiting a Tzaddik, learning Torah, strengthening our Emunah, (our pure faith) we want them to consume us, we want to be remade into the material of the Tzaddik, the Land of Israel, the Torah, or Emunah.

Other times, we don't want experiences that might be negative or harmful to consume us. We don't want to become part of that bad experience. Again we can find analogs in the physical world: Unfortunately people subjected to abuse often become abusive themselves. These people have been devoured by the experience, their nature has become part of the nature of abuse. (This applies even to minor verbal abuse)

Basically, every encounter we have with anything outside ourselves has the ability to influence and change us. This is the basic tenet of the psychology called behaviorism. However, it is ALWAYS within our control to choose to influence that experience, rather than be influenced by it. Note the emphasis on the word 'choose.' We can always choose what we want, but our success is not assured. Life is effort, life is work, and sometimes (though it seems unfortunate) we have more to learn and gain from the loss than we do from the victory.

What is important to be aware of is that every loss (just like every win) is an opportunity to once again be affected and consumed, or to affect and consume.

This is at the root of Teshuvah. Teshuvah is the act of turning the experience from one that consumed us into one that we consume and change into a different, higher, and more refined nature.

This is also why I've stated in the past that Teshuvah applies to mitzwoth as well as aveiroth (sins) because we can choose in the here and now to allow that past experience of a mitzwah to consume us and affect us more fully. (Just as we can do the opposite with a negative past experience.)

The one caveat here is to understand that just as in Kashrut, there are some things that no matter how we may try, they will always consume us, because they aren't palatable. And for this reason, they are always forebidden; So too, sins (aveiroth) are actions/experiences that HaShem informs us from the start: they will certainly consume you and bring you down.

Neutral experiences can be brought to great holiness, in fact, that is a major part of our job here in this world. But non-neutral negative experiences (read: sins) cannot be brought to holiness through their performance. Only after the fact, if we slipped, then Teshuvah allows us, through super-human effort, to fix, consume, and change even these negative acts.

We need to strengthen these muscles. We need to recognize that every experience is an opportunity to come closer to HaShem, to experience HaShem more fully. Whether it is through deepening the experience by letting it overwhelm us, or it is by taking control of and modifying that experience.

All of these insights you can internalize through focusing on eating and what it does to you, and what you do to the food.

(maybe I should have called it, if you can't join em, eat em.)

word offerings

All of us bear within us the Holy letters of HaShem's speech that give us life. Everything in existence does. When we sin, these letters are cut off from Godliness and become a channel for the klippoth, the purely self-interested element of creation, to gain sustenance.

This is why teshuvah must be done through words, through vidui, the pronouncement of your sins before HaShem. Each utterance of the vidui returns those Holy letters to their source, reconnecting them and us with the source of all life.
(paraphrased from the Pri Haaretz on parashath beha'alotcha)

the fixings of yesteryear

Today's Tanya makes a great if seemingly discouraging point: Our sins exist outside of time, which means that while in the past we may have made peace with them, they still exist in the present as if we had performed them this very second.

Ouch.

First off, this whole explanation is brought in the Tanya as a way of breaking yourself, intentionally, when you feel like you are distant and cold, when you can't seem to make a connection with HaShem.

So, let's try to envision this in a productive way that might be able to turn this teaching in a way that can inspire us and keep us from getting depressed about the idea of never being able to escape our sins.

In Iggeret haTeshuvah the Baal HaTanya explains that one can think of the six hundred and thirteen mitzwoth as strands of a greater rope that is our attachment to HaShem. Whenever we sin, we damage the related strand, and if our sin is repeated or done with particular disdain, that strand can be broken. No worries though, we still have 612 more strands holding us firmly to HaShem.

Still, because that strand is damaged, our relationship with HaShem is lacking something major. Let's just say it might only be one out of six hundred and twelve, but when each single strand gives us a connection and awareness of the infinite Creator, that's a pretty significant loss.

Also, because this rope links us and HaShem, it transcends time.

Taken this way we can look back on the Baal HaTanya's original comment and understand how it is that our sins are above time and each day, they may cause a lack in our relationship with HaShem anew. Until we retie that strand and re-strengthen it so that it cannot tear again, we run the risk of having to do Teshuvah over and over again. [Presumably this situation described above takes into account Teshuvah from yirah and not from ahavah, which is higher and reseals the breach as if it had never been.]

There remains one more question with our understanding of the Tanya, if it is that David HaMelech discusses this phenomenon as if he has to do teshuvah every day, we cannot assume he never did Teshuvah from Ahavah, but rather I will have to bring the Noam Elimelech to explain how David HaMelech, a Tzaddik, could say that about himself, despite his level.

The Noam Elimelech explains that normal people are bogged down with sin, all the while thinking they are tzaddikim, whereas the Tzaddikim find even their (own) most perfect deeds full of sin and lowliness so that every day the Tzaddik pursues HaShem with renewed intensity and increased vigor. This is a kindness because it inspires the rest of us to recognize our flaws and work to heal them. Here too, David HaMelech, by saying his sin is always before him, inspires the rest of us to seek out our sins and rectify them through ever greater efforts.

The upshot of the Tanya is, on a day where we feel a strong bond with HaShem, we don't need to depress ourselves with these thoughts, and we can safely ignore the Noam Elimelech being beinonim and not Tzadikim ourselves. Still, we can learn from the Tzaddikim that when we feel a strong bond with HaShem and great joy, that we should reinvest that energy into mitzwoth, tefilloth, and Torah study to let HaShem know we appreciate where we are, but we still want more!

healing our fathers

Someone asked me recently, though I can't seem to remember the context, (perhaps I dreamed it?) if we could explain a practical reason we don't eat Gid HaNasheh, the sciatic nerve, beyond the explanation given in the Torah that it was where the angel injured Yaakov Avinu.

I think perhaps there is a basis to say that through not eating the Gid HaNasheh, we are actually strengthing and healing Yaakov Avinu's leg. This particular mitzwah is associated with this part of the body, and through performing this mitzwah we are returning our collective soul to this part of the collective body from whence it was driven out.

This is mentioned by-the-way in the beginning of Parashath Hukath by the Noam Elimelech. There he goes on to explain (according to Rashi according to Rabeinu Mosheh haDarshan) that the reason the parah adumah is considered a hok, generally a law with no known reason, is because it is the only mitzwah that does not correspond to a particular part of the the body, neither the 248 limbs nor the 365 sinews. Why doesn't it correspond to a part of the body? Because its sole purpose was to educate the masses about the reality of Teshuvah. In this explanation even the sin of the golden calf only came about in order to create a situation that the mitzwah of the Red Heifer would be revealed such that we all could reveal the great mitzwah of Teshuvah.

the roots of change

I was overjoyed this morning at this new understanding, so bear with me and perhaps you will enjoy it too.

According to the Bnei Yisaschar (Reb Tzvi Elimelech of Dinov) the Torah of Din, which was also the Torah of Beit Shammai, requires building step by step from humble origins to great accomplishments. The Torah of Hesed, which was also the Torah of Beit Hillel, on the other hand can be attained and perceived in a single moment. With this the Bnei Yisaschar explains the difference of opinion regarding the Tree New Year. Both agree that the fullness of the Tree New Year is reached on the 15 of Shvat, but Beit Shammai believes we have to work to get there hence we celebrate it on the 1st of Shvat, while Beit Hillel believes we can receive the fullness all at once on the 15th, so we celebrate then. (See more detail in this earlier post)

Today, Rosh Hodesh Shvat, is the Tree New Year according to Shammai, and I wanted to celebrate it with extra joy so that I could satisfy both opinions. (even though l'halachah we hold like Beit Hillel in this case) I was upset however that for a number of reasons I didn't have the time I wanted to really focus on Rosh Hodesh and the Tree New Year. I was upset until HaShem reminded me of Beit Shammai's opinion, which is that we can't just jump into something, but rather must build towards it. With this knowledge I was able to greatly enjoy the limited celebration that was the oppurtunity available to me, knowing full well that I would build from this starting point until a real crescendo on Tu b'Shvat, the 15th.

From this I was able to understand what a special time Rosh Hodesh Shvat is as well as all the days from now until Tu b'Shvat. They are especially me'sugal, (pertinent) to accomplishing great things through slow and steady growth through devotion.

Now is the time of year when we are encouraged to build gradually, to take on small advances and not big ones, to make minor and lasting changes such that fourteen days from now we will be thoroughly changed and (seemingly) effortlessly new.

This is mirrored in the nature of the awakening of the trees from winter, they don't appear to change at all on the outside, but today the sap begins to flow, and before we know it, 14 days from now there will be new buds, promises of new life, new growth, of another spring.

reviving the dead

On a note that is semi-related to the previous post, let's look at a chidush of the MaBiT on the Rambam's hilchoth Teshuvah 6:4. The Rambam states that there are certain great sins for which the punishment is that HaShem refuses to allow the sinner to do Teshuvah. He bases it on the passuk about HaShem hardening Pharo's heart. The MaBiT asks how is it that the Rambam can posit a new class of punishment not listed in the Torah? His answer goes like this: Sometimes someone wanders off the path (sins) and becomes somewhat lost from HaShem. The only way back to walking the path is to retrace one's steps. If someone sins many times, meaning he wandered far into the brambles, the path back may be lost to them. In this way, the Rambam isn't describing a new punishment, and HaShem doesn't bring the punishment upon him, rather the person brings the punishment upon himself.

My question here, is that just because the MaBiT explains the mechanics of the situation, it doesn't truly answer the question of why we never heard of this class of punishment until now, something I believe the MaBiT himself acknowledges in recognizing his isn't a complete answer to the original question.

There's actually another question of interest that I came across this Shabbath: Reb Natan in Likkutei Moharan I:112, brings down Masechet Menahoth 29b in which it is explained that a person cannot return through the same opening which he strayed, rather they must open for him a new opening. If this is the case, then the MaBiT's metaphor for Teshuvah seems to contradict our gemara here in Menahoth?

Since this whole post is sort of a side note, I'm compelled to take you on two more related tangents: In discussion of this idea, that someone cannot return through the portal through which they fell, Rebbe Nachman answers Reb Natan's question explaining something unbelievable: When one falls, one can ascend through an opening through which someone else, your friend, fell, because when someone (named A) falls from on high, he is still higher up than someone else. (named B) In this manner B can actually rise through the portal through which A fell. Meaning that when a person falls it is sometimes for the purpose of the aliyah (yeridah l'tzorech aliyah) of someone else.

The final step in this winding post is the Noam Elimelech's explanation in the end of parashath Naso, in which he explains what it means that someone could perform a sin for the sake of heaven: Sometimes a Tzaddik needs to perform what in his eyes would be a grave sin, so that he can reach down to such a level that he can have a connection with even the lowest of people such that he can bring them blessing and shefa. This, he explains, was the problem with Shaul HaMelech who was without sin, he couldn't relate to and bring blessing to the lowest of Bnei Yisrael, even though it is the King's duty to do just that, bring blessing to all of Bnei Yisrael.

To tie everything back to the previous post I must share two more points: Rebbe Nachman explains (in Likkutei Moharan I:112 mentioned above) that the only way to illuminate the darkness when you have fallen is through speaking words of Truth. Truth being the light of HaShem, nothing can hide from Truth, so even the lowest and darkest places are illuminated in the presence of spoken Truth.

Why spoken Truth? This plays off of the Pri Ha'aretz on parashath VaEra, the weekly parshah just passed. Rebbe Menachem Mendel of Vitebsk, the Pri Ha'aretz, reveals that when someone knows and recognizes that all his speech is not really his own but rather emanates from HaShem Himself, then through his speech he can create worlds, just as HaShem's speech did in the creation of the world. From this we can see, taken together with Rebbe Nachman, that when we speak Truth from the deepest places, it becomes clear that we are not speaking at all but instead it is only HaShem who speaks. (Perhaps this is one of the deep secrets of Mechayey HaMeitim, as we know that the Targum of a "living soul" is a "speaking spirit," and a sinner is considered to be dead in his lifetime.)

always getting yourself into trouble

This Shabbath I revisited one of my favorite and most personally life-changing Torahs in Likkutei Moharan (I:113) in which Rebbe Nachman brings a teaching of the Baal Shem Tov that HaShem allows us to pass judgment on ourselves.

To explain it a little better, the Baal Shem Tov says that HaShem never passes judgment on you unless both the whole world and you agree with that judgment. How does this work? He puts someone in front of you that acts in the same way that you yourself acted and you pass judgment on this person, you are then held accountable for your own actions in keeping with your own judgment of them. [see this earlier post for more detail]

In my attempt to explain this mechanism a little, I connected it to the testament brought down by the Komarna Rebbe in the Notzer Hesed, that anything bad you have ever heard about another Jew is complete and total baseless lie without any part of truth. [see this earlier post for more details on this and on its connection to the above]

Basically, the way I understand it is like so: The judgment is essentially automatic. The world is such that there is Truth, and there are the powers that conceal the Truth, 'the powers that lie.' The powers that lie are given dominion only over those that willingly give 'the powers that lie' dominion over themselves. How does one put themselves under the auspices of 'the powers that lie?' by believing in the lies.

If we look at it from a certain perspective, we can see how all of Bnei Yisrael are tzaddikim, (just as Chazal say) and when we look around, we see all manner of lies trying to convince us of the lack in one Jew or another. (But, just as Chazal tell us, if we see a Tzaddik sin, we need to believe that they did teshuvah that same day.) These lies themselves are results of our own misdeeds and they blind us from seeing the reality. If we then believe what we see, and believe the lie, then it gains power over us to cut us off from HaShem (chas v'shalom) in that exact way that we believed that other Jew was disconnected from HaShem. (chas v'shalom)

In this way sinning is a two-stage process, there is the act of sinning itself, of which Chazal say "no one sins except because a spirit of foolishness entered him." The act itself is a test from HaShem. Then the real test of the sin is whether this sin which has been given a limited dominion over us, to corrupt our perception and believe another Tzaddik is guilty of that sin,
will be believed, in which case we truly seal our own fate.

If instead we are able to ignore that bad, deny its existence in others and instead find their good points, then HaShem is willing to overlook our own failings. Still we have the matter of Teshuvah, which will help us to rectify our perception until we no longer even see lies in the actions of others, until we don't even suspect another Jew. The recognition of the reality of what we see itself is a powerful force to encourage our teshuvah, when we realize that the Jews around us are all tzaddikim, and the lies before our eyes reflect only our own failings, we will call out to HaShem that he save us from our own limitations, and we will long to be like our fellow Jews, as holy and pure as they.

peace for peace

[I'm sure there must be precedent for this in the literature of Chazal, but for me this is a hidush.]

We are taught that on our wedding day we are forgiven for all our sins.

My hidush is this: Every day that we restore our relationship to the status it had on our wedding day, we are forgiven for our sins.

People may say (and rightly so) no, your relationship has grown since your wedding, bringing it back to the relationship it was on the day of your wedding would be a step backwards. True. But the intention here is not that your relationship is the same as on your wedding day, but rather just as on your wedding day you were in a state of complete peace with one another, any day you restore total and complete shalom bayit, that day is like your wedding day.

To those who feel this isn't very difficult, I'm happy to hear that. I don't even know if it is difficult at all. My point is that the kavanah of the statement that we are foregiven for our sins on our wedding day is based in the shalom and unity of the new couple. Whenever we act to maintain that unity, HaShem certainly forgives us our past sins.

[this is why, in shacharit, creating shalom bayit is one of the things that "we eat the fruits in this world, and the keren, the lump sum, is waiting for us in the next world," we merit to be foregiven in this world, that is the fruit we eat, and in turn, because we are absolved in this world, we receive the next world as well.]

rashaim uplifting tzaddikim

Building on the previous Torah, (words caught in the throat) The Noam Elimelech (Parashath Metzora) goes on to explain the phrase Baalei Teshuvah can stand where even Tzaddikim cannot. (במקום שבעלי תשובה עומדים אפילו צדיקים גמורים לא יכולים לעמוד)

Tzaddikim, through their total and complete dedication to HaShem, uplift their words of Torah and Tefillah straight to the heavens. If, heaven forebid, a Tzaddik learns or prays without proper devotion or to some other end, then the words fall below the Tzaddik, and the Tzaddik is helpless to uplift them.

Only the Rasha, who is below, who determines to do true Teshuvah, through his sincere Teshuvah can raise up these fallen words and redeem them. This is the meaning of the phrase where Baalei Teshuvah stand, even complete Tzaddikim cannot stand.

To me it seems there are a number of things we can explore here. It ties into many different Torahs about Tzaddikim. I'll bring two here:

The Notzer Hesed explains that Tzaddikim can reach a level where they aren't really in the world anymore, so much so, that they are almost unable to affect any change in the world at all. This would explain why the Tzaddik cannot sink to the level to which his words (chas v'shalom) may have fallen.

Rebbe Nachman of Breslov explains that Tzaddikim can throw their voices, in effect, reaching reshaim, and even non-Jews (who have a spark of a Jewish soul and are waiting to convert) at all levels and inspire them to return to HaShem. Apparently there is a level and a way that the Tzaddik actually "drops" his words to lower levels (similar to what the Noam Elimelech described above) on purpose, as a means to lead a Rasha back to HaShem so he may do Teshuvah. (Rebbe Nachman says that Tzaddikim can even throw their voices across generations or through other people to reach yet other people.)

chirping for the upper worlds

Another great mashal, this one from the Maggid via the Baal HaTanya (Torah Ohr 21:3) which I happened to see quoted in Rav Yitzhak Ginsburg's Introduction to the Kabbalah of the Arizal (hebrew) p.161:

Just as hearing a bird speak brings everyone great surprise and enjoyment, [whereas a person being able to speak wouldn't thrill anyone] so too, when a person of flesh and blood, inhabitant of the lowest of worlds discovers how to serve HaShem through teshuvah, all the upper worlds are joyous and surprised.

bread of depth

I was recently bombarded by a number of very broad statements in Torah:

Tzava'ath HaRivash : Sexual desire is the source of all ta'avot
Noam Elimelech : Ga'avah is the force behind all aveirot
Noam Elimelech : Eating is the universal tikkun

Here's my attempt to understand how they interact and complement one another rather than contradict: (note that above I've already paraphrased them in a way of least possible conflict)

Sexual desire is the origin of all desire. Freud says something similar, but that doesn't prove our point. At its essence the sexual desire is to unite two parts of a single whole. All of our desires begin with a perceived lack. We see something that promises to fill that emptiness within us and that is why we desire it. The catch with desires is that we feel them, but we don't generally understand why we feel them.

Ga'avah is the basis of all sin, because we need to see ourselves as separate and important before we would sin. If we were to be aware of our life as originating from God and His mercies, we wouldn't have the audacity to sin. If we recognized the harm our actions do to ourselves and others, we also wouldn't sin. It is only when we refuse to acknowledge our source in HaShem and claim a greater importance over others that we could sin.

Eating is the basis of all tikkun. How is this so? Eating educates us in a way that solves both of our major failings at once. On the one hand, eating is one of our first challenges as living beings that allows us to become consciously aware of how our lacks, our inner emptiness, affects what we desire. On the other hand, eating forces us to recognize that we are not complete and independent. This recognition opens a door for us to walk through humbly, acknowledging all of HaShem's mercies and recognizing the needs of others as well.

When we reach complete consciousness in our eating habbits, we reach a level of awareness from which we can also vanquish our desires and acknowledge HaShem's constant kindness in filling our needs.

dashboard indicator

When it comes to discussing the nega'im (spots/blemishes) of Tzara'at, the Torah speaks first about neg'aim on the person's body, then on the clothes and then on one's house. But this the opposite of what we would expect for we know that HaShem first warns someone of their misdeeds through their house and their clothes and only afterwards through bodily damage. Yet the Torah is teaching us an important lesson in approaching HaShem through holiness. First one must work on his middoth and his other limitations, represented here by his body. Afterwards he must work on his mitzwah performance to ensure it is pure and untainted by alternate motives, represented here by his clothing for the mitzwoth are our clothes. Finally he must work to perfect the part of the higher world which is related to his soul, this is represented by his house. Only then can a Tzaddik bring down blessing and infuse the world with Godliness.
(paraphrased from the Noam Elimelech, parashath Tazria)

The Noam Elimelech doesn't touch on why the Torah chooses to bring down this lesson through tzara'ath, which means it must be a fairly simple explanation. Let's attempt something of an answer.

Tzara'ath at it's core was essentially an aid in making people aware of their current predicament. This was a tool to enable people to improve their relationship with HaShem. Nowadays we no longer have Tzara'ath, but the Noam Elimelech is teaching us that we can still use it as a tool to become closer to HaShem.

clouds within and clouds without

Building on the torah I mentioned about Yom Kippur here, I'd like to discuss how Yom Kippur connects to Sukkoth, and why it is that one precedes the other.

The Tanya teaches us that when one sins, HaShem nourishes us externally from an infinite distance known as makif, (translated as surrounding) in other words, when we transgress His desires, He still nourishes us with life, but will have no part in it directly. Conversely when we perform mitzwoth, as we've mentioned in the past, we have the oppurtunity to create a dwelling place for HaShem within those actions, and within ourselves.

When we sin we also take of the life-force that HaShem has given us and use it to perform these nefarious deeds.

So, when we do Teshuvah, we find that we are actually rectifying two kinds of divine light. The small trickle of life force that was within us when we performed the sin, and the surrounding makif light that was the essence of our relationship with HaShem at that moment.

We spoke about the small inner life force, when we understood that it is this which becomes the cloud through which we are able to perceive HaShem. (כי בענן אראה על הכפרת)

What we didn't talk about was what happens to the rectified makif light when we do Teshuvah. It too is turned into a cloud, but in this case the cloud is a surrounding (makif) cloud. The Teshuvah of Bnei Yisrael is the source of the ענני הכבוד - the Clouds of Glory that surrounded Bnei Yisrael and protected them in the desert. These are the clouds that the Sukkah represents.

This is why Yom Kippur comes after Sukkoth, so that the rectification of our past transgressions complete the clouds of glory of the Sukkah. On Sukkoth we sit surrounded and protected by the product of our refined sins. (This is a hidden meaning of - במקום שבעלי תשובה עומדים אין צדיקים גמורים יכולים לעמוד - the Sukkah of a Ba'al Teshuvah is different than the Sukkah of a Tzaddik Gamur.)

eating with heavenly intent

Chazal Tell us that on Yom Kippur Bnei Yisrael are like Angels.

We also see in Bereishith, that Havah (חוה) was told by the Snake that on the day she ate from the Eitz Hada'ath her eyes would be opened like the Elohim. (There are places in Tanach where Elohim means Angels)

So it seems to me that Havah ate from the tree to give us the day of Yom Kippur. (One transgression to ensure that your descendants would have a day of divine mercy and forgiveness every year? sounds like a sound investment to me. This happens to also explain the question raised about the Talmud that specifically says אחטא ואשוב twice. Why twice? Once for Havah and once for Adam.)

try not to ruin a good thing

This morning I had the priviledge to say slichot and pray with Hassidei Beit El (as the Ben Ish Hai refers to them) opposite the kodesh kedoshim in the kotel tunnels.

So much of what I've been reviewing lately in the Notzer Hesed on Achdut just gelled. Shlomo Katz mentioned that Rav Avraham Yitzhak haKohen Kook said that Teshuvah is really a return to normalcy, not some intense work to change oneself. That's almost how I saw it this morning.

I'll try and describe it a little. There is HaShem's ultimate plan: An infinitely deep relationship with a nation called Yisrael. Then there is you and me. When we try to play up our own individual piece of the plan, it is like an ant trying to upstage a mountain. We can either connect to that relationship of Yisrael and HaShem, or be left out in the cold trying to be our own something else.

It was beautiful and so comforting. We're already part of the best thing happening.

it's not so different from playing catcher

In yesterday's Tanya, R' Shneur Zalman of Liadi explained that HaShem's forgiveness is infinite. He also went into how we bless Him that he forgives us right after we ask for forgiveness, without even waiting to see if we are forgiven. This is because HaShem has infinite mercy and is always willing to forgive even after repeated transgressions. He's willing to forgive as readily after the thousandth transgression as He was to forgive the first time. In this He is utterly different from a person, who is willing to forgive and forget the first time, but becomes increasingly doubtful with each continued ill.

I'd like to take this in a slightly different direction. The Baal HaTanya also talks about how since we know that HaShem's kindness is infinite, so we know that all of His attributes are similarly infinite. From here he explains how it is that HaShem's Gevurah is able to hide and contain his Hesed, his kindness, when it isn't called for. Since HaShem's Gevurah is also infinite, it can hold back HaShem's infinite kindness.

Now, I'd like to learn about the rest of the Berachoth in the Amidah, the Shemonah Esrei, from what the Baal HaTanya taught yesterday about the berachah of סלח לנו - forgive us. Just as we say that HaShem forgives us immediately after our asking him to, so too we must learn the other berachoth similarly: When we ask HaShem for healing, for beracha/rain/livelihood, for the ingathering of the exiles, for the rebuilding of the Jerusalem and the Beit HaMikdash, for the coming of ben David, for the answering of our prayers, for the return of His Divine Presence to Zion, for bringing peace to Israel, etc. when we ask HaShem for any of these, we also must know that He grants them immediately.

We have to bring ourselves around to this understanding, we have to come to this level of emunah, just as we need to understand and truly believe that HaShem forgives us completely as soon as we ask it of Him.

One might say "this sounds nice, but that isn't the way the world works." Isn't it? How much of a difference does one's expectations and perceptions have on the outcome of one's efforts? When people (especially children who lack the learned cynicism of adulthood) expect to recover from illness, medical treatments are far more effective. When people lack confidence they fail far more often. When people think something is impossible they give up far more quickly. When people are empowered by faith in themselves and others' faith in them, they accomplish exponentially more.

How do we know it isn't us holding ourselves back? Look to the story of the meraglim. How do we know HaShem's hands aren't open to give us every single thing that we could possibly want or need and it that it isn't just us and our lack of faith getting in the way?

Oh wait, it is just us, because HaShem tells us Himself that the evil never comes from My mouth.

HaShem waits with open arms all day every day for us to jump into them, to say "Abba, protect us, help us, save us."

There is a principle of berachoth in which we say הכל הולך אחר החתימה - everything goes according to the seal. The normal understanding of this is that the most important part of the berachah is the end--it's not complete until the end defines where the berachah is really going. But, we can also read it: everything goes after the seal. After the berachah is already sealed and done, that's where all the challenge comes in. We have to be ready to receive the berachah, if we aren't then all the berachoth in the world won't help us.

scoring on the rebound

The Baal HaTanya explains that our soul is like a rope that connects us to HaShem, through our actions, either we ascend upward to unify with HaShem or else we drag HaShem's head down into the muck with us. (A metaphor for bringing down the divine influx to feed the side of impurity)

We also see in Hesed l'Avraham that Rav Azulai describes how the Shechinah, in Her current state of exile greatly relishes the blessings brought down by even our simplest mitzwoth, being that She is so lacking. Likewise She calls out for judgement when our actions have negative repercussions and cut off the tenuous flow that She still receives.

In parashath Mishpatim, the Noam Elimelech gives us some crucial advice:

When one becomes aware of a sin one committed, one should immediately do teshuvah. He explains that while one remains in his condition of having sinned, any act of Kedushah that s/he may perform will nourish not only the side of holiness but also the "other" side. (chas v'shalom) By performing immediate teshuvah, not only are we cleansed of the sin, but we prevent our unintentional empowerment of the forces of impurity.

All of these different sources have cropped up in my learnings these past few days. Taken together we see the importance of Reb Melech's advice. Whenever we catch ourselves in a transgression, or whenever afterwards, whenever it comes to our attention, we should stop everything and return to HaShem at that very moment.

There are times when our emotional psychological and spiritual wellbeing all require that we pretend that we are perfect tzaddikim with no sins whatsoever--sometimes that is the only way to move on, it is actually part of our secret nuclear arsenal against the yetzer hara. But like any weapon it can be used for good or evil, we must also recognize the times when our avodah will be stronger by fessing up as soon as possible, pausing for a moment and taking responsibility for our actions. Perhaps this is a small taste of what it is to be a true Tzaddik, after all the Noam Elimelech is called the Book of Tzaddikim. We can see David HaMelech, Mosheh Rabbeinu, and other Tzaddikim on numerous occasions falling before HaShem in immediate teshuvah and prayer when they recognized even a potential wrong on their part.

Don't try to jump ahead of yourself, Reb Elimelech also points out that parashath Mishpatim comes right after the commandment not to alight on steps to the mizbeach in the end of parashath Yitro. This is an admonishment about rising above our level, rather than growing slowly and steadily. Perhaps from time to time we can start to introduce immediate Teshuvah into our lives when we have the strength and courage to do so.

In our teshuvah b'zrizut may we merit to receive the countenance of the Shechinah.