Its the journey not the destination

The Noam Elimelech on parashath Shemot says something very cool: Why does the parashah start with Bnei Yisrael coming down to Egypt and continue about Bnei Yaacov who arrived in Egypt? He explains: The Tzaddik who is starting out on his journey is called 'Yaacov', and often this Tzaddik feels like he has already attained righteousness, he's already arrived. But the true Tzaddik is called 'Yisrael' and he knows that his accomplishments are forever dwarfed by what he has yet to achieve, and so he is always "on his way," never actually getting there.

I think one thing we can learn from this teaching of the Noam Elimelech is that in order to attain holiness, we need to first think we've arrived, that we already made it, so that all the depression and self doubt don't trip us up. Only after we've achieved some level of holiness, we need to start recognizing how far we still have to go.

In order to get anywhere, we need to arrive first.

Remember to put on your tefillin when you put on your tefillin

When you put on your tefillin, it's easy to just put them on by rote. But you can just as easily remember R' Nachman's Likkutei Halachot, and when you wrap the hand-tefillin think of and connect with Klal Yisrael. When you donn your head-tefillin think of and connect to HaShem (if you feel too distant from HaShem at present you can connect to the true tzaddikim, who exist solely for the purpose of helping us connect to HaShem.)Now you've put on your tefillin.

The elephant in the room

 When we talk about the number of candles we light on Hannukah, we inevitably ignore the Shamash, after all, it isn't one of the actual candles of the mitzwah. It's a helper candle. Yet, for children, and even for our own eyes, it's a constant source of cognitive dissonance. On the first night we light one candle. ..in addition to the Shamash, so when we look and see a Hannukiah (aka. Hannukah Menorah) lit on the first night, there will be two candles there.

Yeah ok, we all can deal with a little cognitive dissonance, but since nowadays everyone lights the Shamash, and (almost) everyone lights according to Beit Hillel, we should delve into the deeper meaning of the Shamash as well.

One thing to learn from the Shamash, is that whenever we are involved in a mitzwah, HaShem is right there with us, involved too. The Shamash's light represents that, and helps us to properly perform the mitzwah, just as HaShem is always helping us to perform each mitzwah.

Normally HaShem's presence is implicit, why make it explicit on Hannukah? On Hannukah a unique and elevated light is revealed in the world, so high that we can't use it for any other purpose than simply to look at the candles. Also, on Hannukah, that light illuminates in the lowest places, even deeper than HaShem's light normally descends the rest of the year. So on Hannukah, the Shamash represents HaShem's participation in our mitzwot in a more visceral way than the rest of the year.

So when we look at it that way, there's no cognitive dissonance, as the Baal Shem Tov teaches, [see: helping us (all) along] HaShem always helps us do the mitzwoth.. He even does the lion's share of the work, we do the physical action and He reflects those actions in more radical changes throughout the upper worlds.

One little light

In the Sefer Menorat Zahav parashat Bereishit we learn about the debate between Rav Zusha of Anipoli and his brother the Noam Elimelech regarding how better to approach service of God.

Is it better to recognize one's own insignificance in order to arrive at an understanding of the greatness of God? Or is it better to focus on the greatness of God in order to arrive at a true level of humility?This is the question they posed to their Rebbe, the Maggid of Mezritch.

This Hanukkah it occurs to me that this question mirrors the two methods of lighting the hannukiah put forward by Beit Hillel and Beit Shammai. Beit Hillel says you start with a single light, with the humility of your own insignificance and then you build to many lights recognizing the greatness of HaShem's presence in the world. Beit Shammai says you start with all the beautiful greatness of HaShem's many lights and then work your way down to the smallness of your one little light.

The Maggid's answer to the original question is in line with the Halakha as well: they are both the words of the living Torah. But it is more correct (safer) to start from one's own smallness in serving HaShem.

And so that's another reason we start with just the one little light on the first night of Hannukah.

All the way down

Today I was reminded of something the Tanya mentioned a few weeks ago:

"Learning Torah reveals tremendous amounts of light in the upper worlds.. but only prayer draws that light down into this world."

The shacharit prayer is constructed such that there's an ascension in the first half, a silent focused prayer at the pinnacle of the world, and then a descent back to earth in the second half... It's during the second half where we draw the light back down into this world.

Sadly I usually rush through the second part of the tefillah, even though, when you think about it, if you don't invest energy in bringing the light down, you climbed all the way up for nothing.

(of course not entirely nothing, and I could explain why at length, but let's just say for now, what Rebbe Nachman says, no positive action or good intent is ever lost.)