spreading the wealth

In the parable of the Baal Shem Tov, [see: parable of the baal shem tov] the son of the King is described as distributing everything in his posession for it is without value. The only thing of value to him is the presence of his Father, the King.

Classically, the midah of freely distributing one's wealth, a practice generally reserved for tzaddikim, usually deals with material wealth.

I'm going to, with the aid of a Torah of Rebbe Nachman, reexamine this midah in the realm of spiritual wealth as well.

Rebbe Nachman taught that in order to really reach fulfillment, every day we must start from scratch. We must be infinitely young, in that we start with a blank slate, knowing nothing. This in turn makes us infinitely old, since we connect to the root of Wisdom (Hochmah) which is the power of not knowing, the power of knowing to ask questions.

It seems to me, in my place of limited knowledge, that there is a grounds to practice this midah of giving all of your possessions away spiritually as well. A midah of not holding back or hoarding Torah, but rather sharing it freely so that when you get to tomorrow, you've got nothing left and you must begin again.

There are clearly some issues with this: The most obvious is Rebbe Nachman's own warning to teachers of Torah not to give over Torah which you haven't fully digested and internalized first. The second would be a teaching I heard from Rav Akiva Tatz that a Jew must always be much deeper than whatever part of himself he exposes. This plays nicely with a third Torah given over by Reb Shlomo Carlebach who said something along the lines of when anything is really true, it's too deep to be shared publicly.

But to all of these I would answer that the midah of giving away all of your possessions only applies to those things you truly possess. If you haven't internalized it yet, it isn't yours to give away. If it is so deep within you, perhaps it possesses you and not the other way around, and if it is not something disparate from you or your relationship with HaSHem, then there's nothing to reveal or give away. It's your essence.

Any Torah that you've obtained however, that can be said to be in your possession, it is yours to freely give away, as the Lubavitcher Rebbe taught, If you know Aleph, teach Aleph.

And if you want to freely give all your possessions away in order to be with your Father, the King, then who can stand in the way of the true son of the King?

tefillah blogging

I've started blogging my daily meditations in tefillah, because it's the most essential part of my day, and because I don't have time always to break down my learning into bite-size postable tidbits.

In the interim, and hopefully even when I get back to blogging Torah, I will try to sum up a new aspect of my tefillah every day; may HaShem grant us all newness in our tefillah always.

There may be those people who voice a question or idea that Rav Shlomo Carlebach explained: When a relationship is spoken about, (to people who are outside the relationship) it greatly cheapens and takes away from the relationship.

How is this tefillah blogging different? I'm not telling you about my relationship with HaShem, only sharing with you some of the insights that come along the way. More importantly, I'm only sharing them as a means to allow others to think more about tefillah in a new way, from a new perspective, and to develop their own relationships with HaShem.

Think of each tefillah blog as roshei perakim, just the table of contents to what we can make of our tefilloth. If anyone thinks this is a really bad, misguided, foolish, or egotistical idea, please set me straight.

preparations for shabbath, definitely recommended

One of my favorite things about working in Israel is that most jobs have vacation on friday, erev Shabbath. The down side for some is that most jobs work on sunday. This doesn't bother me at all, in America sundays always gave me a headache--too much unstructured time. The best part about not working on friday is that I can get all of my Shabbath-related preparations done early, and then enjoy a nice gradual coast into Shabbath. (in theory at least)

Israel, the life where idyllic fantasies become realities, or so I thought. In parashath Beshalach the Maor Eynayim teaches that each day of the six-day work week relates to one of the six middle midoth. (Those that are hinted to by the vav (ו) in HaShem's name: Hesed, Gevurah, Tiffereth, Netzah, Hod, Yesod) Friday relates to the sefirah of Yesod--connection to God. In each of the days you must work in order to rectify that particular midah (attribute) in you for that particular week. (Each week is essentially a fresh cycle with a new you, revealed by the last Shabbath--from a certain perspective)

On friday, the Maor Eyanyim reveals--to my chagrin--that we must work the hardest right up until Shabbath when the calm and peace of Shabbath falls upon the world. The harder we work in those last hours, the more accomplished and fulfilled our week is. [Note of course that this work must be in preparation for Shabbath--since the Halachah strictly forbids working for any other reason from at the very least two hours before the beginning of Shabbath]

What am I to do now with this intrinsic desire I have to coast into Shabbath and the reality of the Maor Eynayim that rest on friday will only take away from my heightened Shabbath experience?

Rebbe Nachman would always weigh a new practice or a new teaching for months before taking it upon himself. I will have to follow his good advice and start to think about this new practice and how to and if to fit it into my life. I try and brush it under the table by saying that today's times are so rushed and fast-paced, that by slowing down on friday, it is actually a preparation for Shabbath, but that sounds like an apologetic stretch of the imagination--instead I will maintain that learning Torah is the best way to prepare for Shabbath and try and learn as much as possible in the few hours remaining friday before Shabbath, in a way it's relaxing, but in a way it's still a lot of work. (bli neder)

[For a little added support I will remind myself that Rav Shalom Brodt once related a story about Shlomo Carlebach and intimated that Reb Shlomo used to sit and learn a sizable amount of Torah friday afternoon in preparation for Shabbath and this was one of his most prized private times.]

Shabbath Kodesh and the Torah of the exile

I read a beautiful Shlomo (Carlebach) story, which he told about his father. He mentioned that Yaakov avinu passed on everything he learned to Yosef, his son. What did Yaakov learn from Shem and Ever? The Ishbitzer Rebbe explains that Shem had lived during the destruction of the physical world (the flood), whereas Ever had lived during the destruction of the spiritual world (the tower of babel). From them Yaakov first learned the Torah of living in Eretz Yisrael. Then he returned before he left Israel, to learn the Torah of living in exile. Reb Shlomo explains that only really special teachers were worthy to teach the second Torah, the Torah of Exile.

It makes me happy knowing that growing up, watching my father, I learned from him the Torah of Exile, and more importantly to me, the Torah of living in Eretz Yisrael. I needed to be here, in my home, in Israel. It was torture being in chutz la'aretz. I don't know what it was about me.

When I return to the States to visit, I notice how dark everything is indoors. Here the light is so much more revealed. There, when I enter the home of a Jew on Shabbath, the light that can be found is such a happy surprise, such a comfort. Shabbath stays with us throughout the exile, like the Shechinah.

The Talmud teaches that Bnei Yisrael is the counterpart, the zivug, of Shabbath. Normally I would assume that Bnei Yisrael plays the male role, but in this case, I think the passuk, על כן יעזב איש את אביו ואת אמו וידבק באישתו ויהיו לבשר אחד-therefore will a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife and they will become a single flesh, is talking about the way Shabbath cleaves to us, even in exile. Wherever there is a Jew, there you will find Shabbath.

Even when a Jew is so lost that he is not only far from his holy land, but also doesn't even know what day of the week it is, he must count seven days and observe the Shabbath. No matter how lost we may be, the Shabbath never abandons us.

The, Shlomo Carlebach also relates that the Baal Shem Tov said that a true Hassid always has with him a candle, wine, and bread for Shabbath:

The Baal Shem Tov quoted a passage from the Torah. When Moses spoke to us about going into the desert he said "tachin lekha haderekh, prepare for yourself the way." TaChIN has the initials of tfillin, kikar, yayin and ner. (Tav, chaf, yud, nun.) To prepare yourself for the way means that wherever you go, take your tfillin, a little bread, wine for kiddush and a candle. Real Chassidim always have a little bottle of wine for Shabbos, a little challah, two candles and their tfillin with them all the time, wherever they go.

A real Hassid knows that Shabbath is with him wherever he goes, and wouldn't abandon Shabbath for anything. This is the relationship between the Jews and Shabbath. They cleave to eachother and become one flesh.

[Updated: i noticed this wasn't tagged Shabbath]